Silencing the Saboteur of Self-Doubt

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Self-doubt is a sly thief that robs us of confidence, especially in corporate workplaces where feedback flows freely—sometimes helpful, other times hurtful.

Do you recognize any of the following red flags -

• You can't accept compliments from others, and you can't give yourself credit

• Constantly seek reassurance

• Holding back and playing it safe to avoid risking failure

• Feeling like you're never good enough

Navigating this labyrinth of self-criticism and feedback can feel overwhelming, but with the right tools, you can turn this challenge into an opportunity for growth.

1. Understand Self-Doubt To Reclaim The Lost Power

Self-doubt often arises from two key triggers: Comparison and Criticism.

A study by the American Psychological Association shows that self-doubt activates the brain’s amygdala, which triggers a “fight or flight” response. While helpful in genuine danger, it’s counterproductive when dealing with performance anxiety or workplace feedback.

Imagine a boss or colleague exploiting this know-how to paralyze you. Does it make sense to give your power to others?

Anchor in self-awareness and self-love.

I highly recommend reading ‘Love yourself as your life depends on it.’ Life-changing indeed.

Reframe self-doubt: Instead of seeing it as a weakness, view it as a sign you’re pushing your boundaries—a prerequisite for growth.

2. Taking The Bull By The Horns

1. Clarify: Define the root of your self-doubt. Is it a lack of skills, fear of judgment, or perfectionism? Tagging the root cause helps tackle it better.

2. Challenge: Counter your doubts with evidence. Did you recently complete a major project? List tangible wins. Challenge irrational beliefs by questioning their validity.

3. Celebrate: Micro-celebrations matter. After each small win, treat yourself—it creates positive reinforcement.

Remember that everyone messes up. Focus on - “What can I learn from this?”

3. Dealing with Negative Feedback - Triple Filter Method

Not all feedback is created equal. Some feedback is constructive, some misguided, and some downright destructive. Here’s a system to filter valuable insights from noise:

Filter 1: Intent—Is it Genuine or Malicious?

Ask yourself:

• Is this person invested in my growth?

• Do they have the expertise or authority to give this feedback?

Negative but well-intentioned - Having a ‘Utility over Humility’ conversation is useful.

However, feedback designed to put you down is rarely useful and often reflects the giver’s insecurities. If unsure, seek a second opinion from someone you trust.

Red Alert - Learn to recognize a narcissist. This should be an essential life skill. You can waste years in self-doubt with such a person. Cutting your chords is the only way.

Will leave this here for another post :)

Filter 2: Specificity—Is it Actionable?

Good feedback is specific and tied to observable behavior. For example:

• Actionable: “Your presentation could be stronger if you organized it into three clear sections.”

• Not Actionable: “You’re not leadership material.”

The feedback lacks value if you can’t identify a clear improvement action.

Filter 3: Context—Does It Align with Your Goals?

Does the feedback align with your long-term objectives? Develop a bit of thick skin.

If someone critiques your style but your work consistently meets objectives, the feedback may not be worth acting upon.

4. Turning Feedback into Fuel: The SIFT Model

Once you’ve filtered feedback through the ‘Triple Filter’ System, apply the SIFT method to take action:

Separate emotion from logic. It’s natural to feel defensive, but take a step back and focus on the facts.

Identify patterns. If multiple sources give similar feedback, it’s worth exploring.

Frame feedback as a challenge, not criticism. How can you use this input to grow?

Take Action and create a specific plan to address the feedback. For instance, if you are told to improve your public speaking, enroll in a short course or join Toastmasters.

Don’t react immediately to feedback; thank the giver and process it later.

5. Spiritual Practices: The Methods That Work

Chakras matter. The solar plexus (aka Manipura chakra) is located just above the navel and is associated with self-esteem, confidence, and the ability to act in the world.

Some daily practices that could help activate this important life center are -

• Breath of fire 

• Climbing stairs

• Sun Salutation

Just 3 weeks of regular practice can make you feel the difference in your confidence.

Eventually, Confidence Is a Muscle. Build it.

Self-doubt isn’t a flaw—it’s a sign of growth. And feedback, when filtered and acted upon, can be the rocket fuel for your career.

You’ve got this!

^{Image credits - Painting by Russian artist Evgeiny Nesterov (Saatchi Art)}
If you want to shift gears in your life, search for a new career, or make an entrepreneurial switch, DM me for a discussion. Happy to help in more ways than one!

___Why is it called /SALTT______________

^{In Roman times, salt was prized as much as gold—it was essential and invaluable and paid as a “salary.” To “earn your salt” is to add real value, which is crucial. The phrase still resonates today, but perhaps with an even deeper meaning. Earning our salt is not about compensation only—it’s about contribution, fulfillment, and the courage to live with intention.}